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The Emotions That Destroy All Your Other Emotions by Shiny Unsal

The Emotions That Destroy All Your Other Emotions

Dec 01, 2022

In my trainings, we talk a lot about the emotions behind the emotions because we basically have 8 primary emotions, which are what we innately feel.

What ends up happening is that we attach some other negative emotions to these primary emotions, and those attached negative emotions actually go ahead and destroy all the other positive emotions we are feeling.

And it happens automatically without you realizing what's going on, without you understanding the process or the mechanics behind it because there is a way our mind works, and there's a way that we are designed, you know, we are designed in a certain way.

And you need to understand how you're designed and how you can catch those negative emotions that are about to destroy your positive ones. And that's exactly what we're going to talk about.



Helplessness is one of the most significant negative emotions you can ever attach to any other positive emotion, and you can destroy it in a heartbeat. Why is that?

Let's imagine that you wanted to achieve a specific goal, lose weight, or, better said, be fit.
So, you want to become fit, and you are taking certain actions, and you need to get the desired result in the timeframe you want. So, then what you're doing automatically is telling yourself stories. And those stories are making you feel not good enough; those stories are making you feel like a failure.

And that's exactly why you might feel like you don't have control. You don't have any help like you're helpless anymore. And that negative emotional attachment to any situation you have will destroy any progress and any type of movement or motivation in the future. And it would be best if you watched out.


When you hear a voice in your mind doubting if what you're going to do will work. If that voice is doubting the accuracy, the outcome, or the process of anything you're doing, that doubt will turn into worrying. And when you start worrying, guess what happens?

You feel anxiety, and when you feel anxiety, guess what happens? Anything you have done so far will be destroyed in a minute.

Because not that you're doubting now that you are eliminating, and you are deleting every single achievement or progress or accomplishment that you have done so far, you're only focusing on the what if it goes the wrong scenario.

And that thinking that kind of like negative emotional attachment is going to destroy any kind of hope, any kind of determination, or any kind of power that you have. 


Guilt is a big one. When I do my executive and leadership coaching, what I do is I deal with a lot of guilt because guilt is something that can be mixed easily. Because it's such a subtle emotion, you can mix it with regret and feeling sorry for yourself. Those are different emotions.

Why guilt is a little bit stronger is when it becomes about you. And when you violate your values. And when you feel guilty about that. 

Let's give an example. If you regret something that you have done and feel guilty about when it is about you, your identity, who you are, and what kind of values you violated on your own, that will stick. 

And when you attach that negative emotion to anything you have done or you want to do, trust me, it will destroy in a moment. And that's why you need to be aware of helplessness, anxiety, and guilt. 


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